We actually sometimes drive ourselves "NUTs"!! Yes, when we choose to focus on "N"egative "U"seless "T"houghts we become stressed. Now, take control and remember a happy event in your life, go back there, see what you saw, hear what you heard, just be there for a moment..... How does that make you feel?? Thinking is a matter of choice. Choose to exercise mental strength, to pave the road for your mind to choose the positive way... Because you can....
Can you remember those days when we were kids and go to children’s movies or watch cartoons? If you are like most people, then you would sure remember when you used to dream about being your favorite hero.
Back then, we didn’t simply dream to be, we imagined we are and played as if. We might have even dressed like those admired characters, and we REALLY believed we were and could be…… didn’t we?
Kids would keep on imagining, playing and role acting with confidence, belief and perseverance. And this is when kids would do amazing things. “I guess you could think, sometimes dangerous, I agree J”
The fact is that our brain does not really differentiate between reality and imagination. As long as we have movies played, whether these movies are real events or just imaginary movies in our heads, our brains will believe in them. And when we believe we actualize.
Pay attention to your movies, because what you constantly play, you become!
Now, LET”S PLAY as we used to play when we were kids. And this time it doesn’t have to be Spiderman or Little Mermaid! How about playing your Role Model, the person who really inspires you? “If you don’t have one yet, you should consider thinking of one ”.
Now, imagine as if you are that person and PLAY. Play in your head and keep on playing. Imagine, and make new neural connections in your brain to open new choices and make ways to new options. Play in your head until you really believe that you can.
Only when you believe you can, you can ….. Can’t you?
When we learn the meaning of empathy, and believe that people do what they believe is the best they can under certain circumstances. When we learn to put ourselves in other people"s shoes and respect their model of the world.
When we allow ourselves to let go And Remember to keep a learning. Only then We Can turn From anger to Forgiveness and Move Forward, and GROW
I bet you are already smiling:)
A simple smile has 2 secrets.....
First it works out your facial muscles! Well is that a secret?? No not this one... The fact is, if you only consider using these muscles to put a smile on your face, this little change in your physiology will induce a shift in your state and maybe even releasing happy hormones.
It is actually amazing how states are linked to physiology. The change in these facial muscles work like a push button to the state of being in a smily mood. Test it.... I know you can feel it yourself. Most people do.
The second secret is what Your Smile can do to Others. Neuroscientists have discovered what is called "Mirror Neurons". These neurons fire when we notice an act or a behavior that we are familiar with, and this stimulates the same act or behavior in us. So whenever you smile mirror neurons of others around you may notice this, and a smile is stimulated on their faces.
Have you ever been smiling as you were walking on the street, then noticed strangers smiling back at you??.... I did.
AND, Now I know why I smiled when I saw the picture of that Chimp!!
Mindfulness is simply the idea of going back to oneself. As the old eastern teachings advise, living in the now, paying attention to the present moment and having the self awareness of what is going inside and what emotions are present. Then, being in control of your emotional state and your behaviors.
After measurements of brain activity of a large number of participants, researchers found that individuals who regularly exercised mindfulness showed significantly increased blood flow to areas of the brain associated with controlling emotions and regulating stress. According to these findings, this increase of blood flow not only helped reduce stress and anxiety, but helped people to actually change their brains and improved the quality of their lives.
How to reach this state? We usually seek quick fixes and look for short cuts to reach our goals, but the reality is that we have to build this strength. We actually need to exercise mindfulness regularly.
So if you really want to build your mindfulness strength, you can start by this simple exercise, and make sure to use it whenever you are threatened by emotional reactions.
1. Be aware of the start of any emotional reactivity, any shift in your emotional state.
2. Stop, and take 3 full breaths. Be aware of your breathing in and out.
3. Pay attention to your feelings and notice your emotions. Ask yourself “what am I feeling now?’
4. Go back to whatever you were doing keeping the awareness of your feelings
With these simple steps you can quieten your brain and shift from a reactive mode to an active mode.
Did you know that feeling often follows action??
Our emotional state is affected by our physiology and our thoughts. This means that by changing the way we sit, talk, touch and think, we can induce desired emotional states.
And this is all related to hormones... Not that hormones control us, we actually can take actions to stir emotions in ourselves!
Modern research has shown that intentionally engaging in loving & romantic behaviors allows the brain to release OXYTOCIN a hormone that causes relaxation and deepens the feeling of trust, and the more we release this hormone the more we long for contact which helps in building long lasting love relationships.
Now, Remember that to deepen your love relationship with your partner, keep acting in love and deepen your feelings of love will follow
inspired by Psychology today article
"Whenever we use the word "but" in a sentense, the mind of the listener will probably loose whatever was said before "but" and will focus on whatever comes after "but"!!"
Now consider these two sentenses:
* Your speech was interesting, "BUT" too long!
* Your speech was interesting, "AND" would be even more powerful when you make it shorter!
How could this make a difference in communication? What positive message can you deliver and can be accepted by being aware of what you say?
NLP helps in achieving excellent communication, It is the language of your mind. Can you understand this language Yet?
Image: njaj / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
A well-known speaker started off his seminar holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?" Hands started going up. He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this." He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill. He then asked, "Who still wants it...?" Still the hands were up in the air. "Well," he replied, "What if I do this?............" And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. "Now, who still wants it?" Still the hands went into the air.
"My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you.
The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE TRULY ARE."
You are Special - Always REMEMBER that. And REMEMBER that people are all special....... It takes one to know one, You need to notice the excellence in yourself to notice it in others. PERCEPTION IS PROJECTION.
No resolutions for this year!
What is it that I’m gonna do differently in 2013????
Every year I have been setting goals, thinking of what I want, thinking positively, moving toward goals, etc……
Of course, I have achieved some of my goals, not all, more or less!!
The idea of having a goal is exciting by itself, but it sometimes stops right there, just being excited at setting the goal and talking about it.
I am sure that some of you relate to that, don’t you?
Now, Let’s do this even better.
I am sure you know what you really want. Then, imagine that about 7steps in front of you, there is a big screen.. A screen where you can watch your movie of getting your goal. A compelling and motivating movie, seeing yourself at that specific time AFTER you have successfully achieved your goal.
Well, is this only what you want to get, have or do? Why don’t you let 2013 be really different? How about BECOMING the person who Always get what you want? The person who seeks more than a goal..
If you this is what you want, then watch your movie again and ask yourself: who do I need to BE to always get and do what I want?.. What do I need to change to become that person?
Remember you just need to DECIDE.
Then, you have only 7 steps separating you from this person, 7 steps to walk and step into this person.
Keep moving, and with every step you need to learn about your resources, about how to flexibly move around obstacles, about the actions you need to consistently take to step into your movie and BE….
As you step in you discover that this is no longer the goal it is “The Start” of BEING the person who always Get what you want, Do what you want and BE who you really want…. Because YOU CAN.
If we want others around us to be positive and confident, then we have to create it within ourselves first. This means first focusing on yourself and your positive core and then creating a positive core among others. Building a strong core in yourself means that you can have the confidence you need to do anything.
The amazing thing is that we all have the resources to strengthen our core, some of us might just not know how. The key word here is REMEMBER. Yes remember your resources because everyone has resources in past experiences.
Now that you remembered your resources, Use them by remembering them again and again and Anchor them all, one on top of the other. You might choose to have a kinesthetic anchor like a simple gesture. (Have you ever noticed athletes in the Olympics doing a specific gesture before their games and when they win? This is their “Anchor”). Or you might choose a visual Anchor of a picture or a symbol. Whatever you choose to help you recall your excellent states, your resources, reminding you of all your Strengths, your Peak Experiences and your Successes.
Exercise and strengthen your Core, because mental states are just like physical states they need exercising!